The Last Dance

Those last hugs to Ten hag are they goodbyes ?

at United you get your walking papers for winning the FA, whereas at Arsenal you get the keys to the kingdom and a 5 year leash…just kidding, somewhat, as the circumstances are a little different in that ten Hag isn’t in his first season…that said, there are some similarities from the standpoint that United have a shitload of deadweight, many of whom weren’t of ten Hag’s doing, and they likewise have several emerging blue chippers that appear to fit his tactical script far better than some of the players he inherited…strangely enough I would imagine that his supporters will be using Arteta as an example for why he should stay on…one man’s trash is another man’s treasure

As said as it is I wanted Man Utd to win because they would take the 2nd EL spot and this would put Chelsea in the UECL where the US moronic owners belong if not no European football.

So Pep makes two half time substitutions and then takes off De Bruyne around the 55 mark.

Can you imagine Arteta making bold substitutions when you’ve dominated a first half but things haven’t worked out?

Because if you can that’s where we beat Villa and win the PL this season.

Killroy

Rumour going round that Chelsea’s owners are looking at Mourinho to come in.

That’s even more stupid than the rumour that went round the other month about ManU looking at Southgate.

Marc

Chelsea owners do not have a clue. They are also talking to Tuchel. There is a good chance Potter will be back at Brighton.

Hi Vieira
I think I primarily meant the melodrama of missing out on another title and the fact that 20 years have now elapsed, one year more than when we won in 89 after the famine dating back to 1971. I

Tony and I have also tended to keep our powder dry about transfer speculation in pervious years and this summer feels no different for me. When the people holding the purse strings have made so many errors in the past, it doesn’t augur well that the entire process is about to be repeated, Rice notwithstanding of course who is arguably our most perfect signing since the likes of PV, TH and DB.

KP-well ultimately I’m glad I misread the situation, minus the obvious grief your feeling about our failure to get things right once again…I guess I put more stock into an earlier message of yours that spoke about taking things down on notch…funny enough, I was working on a post about our missteps and mismanagement late last evening, but the more I rehashed the past the more depressed I got, so I decided to stick a fucking pin in it for the time being…have a good one

down A notch

Just surfing and saw Pep is leaving City at the end of next season. It’s a DM story and now they want a subscription and is trying to punch above it weight.

What does Pep know?

Is next season going to be sinking ship syndrome for City?

Wonderwall Mrs G, Oasis, old woman, will be crying in his corn flakes this morning wishing he’d actually been hopping with the boys instead of being a plastic fan standing still for the cameras and played them beautifully. Look they are all plastics, but he was king plastic.

Anyway, doesn’t this open up a sure fired win win solution? Pep won’t win this season with last season malady that Klopp suffered from being the root cause. City players will, be nervous. Daddy is leaving with the footballing golden fleece.

I say Arteta wins the title next season, and then goes to City. Win win in my book. City could be relegated by then, so it will be interesting to see if El B has any City loyalty left.

And what of Pep’s reasons for leaving?

Currently 5 from 6 PL trophies and a CL sees Pep going out on a high results wise, but deep down he can’t be happy with the financial advantages that were so widely used to abuse the system.

https://www.transfermarkt.com/manchester-city/durchschnittsalter/verein/281

The average age of City is 27: by end of next season it will be 28. Who would I want most from City? it would be Rodri, as Rodri at 28 with Rice, and we are solid for at least elite CL level for 3 to 4 seasons.

Foden with Saka & Haaland? It would get me thinking about flying to the Emirates.

Pedro must be having mixed arsehole palpitations because, on the one hand, Pep will be no more where Pedro’s prophecy was El B will win when Pep leaves.

What than? If El B doesn’t win?

Will Pedro be done for? Worse will Pedro ever recover and end up with Inspector Dreyfus PTSD type symptoms; all frothing at the mouth and dribbling with eyes involuntary twitching?

The Arteta sage watching El B leave and LG’s subscriptions with him.

The burning questions is will Pedro leave to follow El B at his next club.

Personally, I’d settle for a manager merry-go-round with El B at City and Pep at The Arsenal.

Now, that would really work for me, what would work for you guys?

TRVL
It does get depressing writing about El B; it’s why I stopped after the season was over. I can neither speculate or have any influence on any TW, so best to wait until we have dried signatures on the contracts.

Last season there were rumblings of Rice and co, but this season there is no TW noise to pick up on; not even at ST time, which seems ominous. Either we’ve gone back to our old TW news blackout or El B and Monsieur Edu are clueless because we have no money.

I’m sure El Bi is using the no money no honey on Josh layered thick that phase 26 is the one that will bring home a trophy. Just won’t say which one by hedging bets. Europe conference perhaps?

Interesting times ahead. Whats your take?

Tony

Pep’s contract is up, he’ll claim time to move on take a year out etc. What it will do is add a huge amount of fuel to the media’s reporting about the charges City are facing. We might see an exodus of players looking to follow Pep.

If Everton have been deducted 10 points for 1 charge City could find themselves being kicked out of the league structure and having to rejoin at the bottom. I don’t think being demoted for 1 season will be enough to dissuade other clubs from doing similar.

@KP

Everyone points to you for being able to provide answer to the story begins the Arteta moniker El B. Do you mind very much sharing that?

begins/behind

it’s much ado about nothing nowadays, as rumours abound before the official opening of the window…some of the outgoing chatter makes perfect sense, like with Eddie, ESR, Jesus, Vieira, Lokonga and Ramsdale, whereas with others, involving the likes of Kiwior and Partey, a little less so…interestingly enough several outlets are reporting that Vieira’s absence on the pitch, after returning to full health, was based on his poor showings in training…not sure how much stock I put into those considering how much MA has used training ground “stories” to justify all manner of things, but I doubt we’d get much for his handpicked bust

seems like our best bet, from a profit margin standpoint, is still ESR, as there appears to be several clubs who feel that for around the 30M mark they might be robbing us blind…it still seems highly unlikely that we’re going to be offloading both Eddie and Jesus, as I’m not convinced that we’re getting an out-and-out Striker this summer…not to mention, their wages will make them difficult to move, even if they wanted to seek potentially greener pastures

as for Kiwior and Partey, any rumours regarding the former are likely coming from his camp, as he can see the writing on the wall with Timber destined to be shoehorned on the left, whereas with Partey, why would we sell him for peanuts, unless there’s actually an Arabian deal in the works, when we could keep him as a potentially valuable depth piece, then let him go on a free next summer

all that said, I can only hope our supposed shopping spree isn’t tied to our ability to raise funds from this lot…as most aren’t the kind of players who generate a lot of interest during the early part of a window, minus ESR…regardless I just can’t see a logical pathway where we can properly trim down this roster and get the pieces we need in…this is where the moves for Tross and Havertz come back to haunt…not because they are useless, but because they aren’t going to be replaced, especially the latter, by players who can actually take us places

as for potential incoming pieces, most of the chatter revolves around the midfield and out wide…I’ve read numerous reports suggesting that we’re contemplating activating Nico Williams release clause…if that were the case, either we’re getting rid of Marts or reducing his role to that of a cover piece on both sides of the pitch, which makes one wonder what roles Tross, Nelson and Jesus would play in MA’s largely static approach to player usage…frankly, Nico doesn’t score near enough to justify any such maneuverings, although I would love him as a rotational depth piece

other than that, I’m still hearing about Sesko, Brobbey, Martinez and even Rashford, but less about an early transfer favourite, Zirkzee…like I stated earlier, I think the only way we get a Striker is if the price is right, cheap that is, and if it’s a younger player who will invariably be trapped behind our underwhelming first choice, Havertz…in light of our manager’s Wenger-like ego, I wouldn’t be surprised if the more people talk about our need for an outright Striker, the likelihood of him pulling the trigger goes down exponentially

as for the aforementioned names, Sesko and Brobbey seem far more likely than Martinez, who will likely re-up with Inter, although he did complicate matters by demanding that things get settled prior to the Copa, or Rashford, considering his longtime United roots and the astronomical fee they would demand…btw the only reason I didn’t make mention of Isak is that once Newcastle revealed their valuation, there’s no way he’s coming, unless they reconsider their position now that United’s FA victory has left them out of Europe

as for our midfield, the two most mentioned names are Bruno G and Zubimendi…surprisingly there’s much less talk about Douglas Luiz, but that might have more to do with Villa’s unwillingness to sell him now that they’ve qualified for the CL, than our interest actually waning…I still think Zubi might have a decided edge as he’s the vastly cheaper option and far less likely to ruffle feathers, which simply won’t be tolerated with our fragile little manager in charge

personally I would lean towards Palhinha, especially if MA’s dead set on having Rice playing a more advanced role, which I still think is a mistake, as he would allow us to commit more men forward without fearing the counter…now if we’re thinking of pairing Rice with another box-to-box midfielder, then having them take turns pushing forward, like he did at times with Soucek, I think any of the first 3 names mentioned would be a better option than Jorginho, who has neither the size nor pace to take on that kind of role

fact remains, if our recruitment and asset management hadn’t been so piss-poor during MA’s tenure thus far, which has been covered up in large part due to our back-to-back 2nd place finishes, this summer should have been fairly straight forward…get rid of some periphery pieces so as to raise more funds, then get a world-class Striker, a left-footed wingback and a CAM with goals in his boots…if we did so, we could easily become the greatest 3-4-3 squad on the planet…Cheers

Rashford would be a poor signing – he’ll cost a fortune and will demand major wages. You could pick up a player who will give the same output for a lot less money.

Bearing in mind Arteta’s penchant for buying in the PL I wouldn’t be in the slightest bit surprised to see it happen.

Marc-of course I might think differently if this was one of those cases where you could secure his services at a cut-rate fee because he was coming off a down year, but the chances of that happening are slim to none

besides the “buying in the PL” angle, MA would be frothing at the mouth over his perceived positional flexibility…in MA’s delusional world where history be damned, he would classify MR as a 3-in-1 type hire, as he could envision himself deploying him in all 3 forward positions…as such he might pay substantially more under the guise that it would be like buying at least 2 players…clearly that can be the only explanation for the ridiculous wages he gifted Havertz

Hi Killroy
One of the better things about my old job was the ability to speak languages. I learnt Spanish prior to a stint in Latin America (ending up with a strong Argentine accent after 4 years living in Buenos Aires), and after a particularly idiotic managerial display (maybe the home loss to Villa?) I called him Senor Stubborn el Bastardo. Not one of my most creative alternative monikers but it seemed to stick.

If anyone ever needed proof that the average football club owner is a complete and utter moron apparently Burnley are looking at Fat Frank as a replacement for Kompany.

https://www.mirror.co.uk/sport/football/news/pep-guardiola-mancity-mikel-arteta-32900157

Guardiola pointing to his successor.
There is always politics in such things so the Legend appears even larger when a buffoon follows.
Same game Fergie played on ManU and they still have not got their foot out of the deep shit

Hoopah

Arteta taking over and then they’re kicked out of the league structure having to re join in the regional leagues would be most amusing.

https://www.theguardian.com/football/article/2024/may/28/jurgen-klopp-drops-city-charges-hint-as-he-bids-farewell-to-liverpool

Full respect to Herr Klopp for saying what most managers wouldn’t, at least serving ones. Notable of course that he left it til he himself was off the bindippers’ payroll. Liverpool would stand to gain most from asterisk – gate I should think.

I wonder if City will claw back the win bonuses they paid Arteta while he stood on the deck of that ship of corrupt fools? That would be an even sweeter outcome for Tets in his hoped for role as Guardiola’s replacement. Talk about a poisoned chalice… 🧋

Someone should do an analysis of what we coulda/woulda/shoulda won if City’s efforts are expunged. 2 titles, 1 league cup, some 5th placed finishes that ought to be CL qualification…

Hi Kroenke,

Hope things are well.

I’m not sure they strip titles etc – I think it looks a bit mickey mouse to start announcing who was champion etc 6 years ago but who knows.

Its the effect on their future that any punishment has that will be interesting – a small points deduction or fine just makes it into a handicap system “OK so we lose 20 points this season but won 6 PL’s, 1 CL , however FA Cups it was worth it” etc. If they’re kicked out of the league structure they’re bust and won’t survive, if they go down a couple of leagues how do they balance the books because straight away they’re breaking FFP rules because their income has just dropped by a hundred million plus?

What ever happens it has to be enough to not only stop City doing it again but also from Newcastle doing it in future.

Hi Marc
Yeah, it’s possibly not the right starting point to compare any likely sanctions on City against what happened with the likes of Juve and Rangers. But if there are to be any RETROACTIVE deductions of points, then they have to count in that respective season’s points tally surely? It’s not just the direct losers to City of trophies either – it needs to be the likes of all the also rans (eg. Spurs, Norwich, WBA – anyone!) claiming to have lost out financially albeit by one place in the table. There’s also the question of having missed out on euro qualification and – if the points deductions are big enough – of avoiding relegation.

Once the evidence all comes to light, and if City are perceived to have been treated leniently, the PL and English Football’s credibility more generally will plummet. The Superleague boys will sniff blood, but by that time an entire generation of fans except the few cunts that support City may be completely alienated. You can expect Clubs owned by US oligarchs to press for tough punishment, but Saudi owned Newcastle may react differently.

In other words, it’s State Capitalism versus Western private Capitalism. Sit back and enjoy watching them eat each other while lawyers bleed them dry.

Kroenke

That’s the reason I’m not sure they’ll look at retrospective punishments – you get into team A were relegated but would have stayed up etc as well as CL / EL positions.

Easier to apply something to next season whether it be a fine, points deduction, relegation and leave history where it is.

It’ll also piss off the scousers no end to not be given 2 league titles.

“The case’s complexity suggests a lengthy legal battle, potentially dragging on for years”

“Clubs in England’s top-flight previously voted to fast-track independent commissions for teams accused of overspending.That was to ensure any potential punishment would be as close as possible to any breach, hence why Everton and Forest have already been punished over breaking Profit and Sustainability Rules (PSR).But the Premier League say the City case is different – according to The Telegraph – because of the depth, scale and complexity of the 115 charges against them”

“While FFP violations by Everton and Nottingham Forest have been identified, charged, and penalties handed out, City are still waiting for their case to be heard. The lack of transparency on how the case is progressing has caused frustration from all quarters.”Our rulebook requires these commissions to be held in private, and everything to be confidential.”

“Not all of these breaches relate to financial issues. Thirty-five relate to the club’s alleged failure to co-operate with the Premier League investigation from 2018 up until February 2023.The financial allegations go back to 2009 and were highlighted in leaked material published by German newspaper Der Spiegel. City have always said these leaked emails were obtained illegally”

Just a few quotes from some reputable sources regarding the case against City…as you can see this case will not be resolved for a considerable period of time unless some sort of “deal” can be made in the meantime…the most likely reason that the other two cases, against both Forest and Everton, were concluded in a much more timely fashion was that they willingly complied with investigators, likely due to the fact that they were assured if they did so it would lessen their respective penalties…all attempts to encourage City to do likewise have failed, including those 35 additional charges related to their refusal to cooperate, which will likely be quashed prior to the penalty phase of the hearings…it’s not too dissimilar from the strategies that are commonly deployed during a Rico trial, where the prosecution uses these sort of charges as a leverage play…not sure how this will all pan out, but I would suspect that “illegally obtained” argument could be a crucial red herring in the whole proceedings…now this isn’t being meted out in a criminal court setting, so that argument might fall on deaf ears, but if I had to hazard a guess, this will not be settled until at least after next season and will somehow depend on whether Pep signs an extension, as the optics involved would be vastly different if he were physically out of the picture…just my thoughts, although they could change drastically should new information emerge…Cheers

here are a few excerpts from an interview with Edu about the upcoming window:

‘This has to be a process that takes weeks and weeks. There on my desk, I have reports with more than 180 pages on a player…It’s really detailed stuff. Physical, technical, mental profile, if you have Premier League experience, if you will be able to adapt. It has everything…What I am going to do now, we have been discussing since January. It’s not my decision or Mikel’s alone. It belongs to a whole group…From recruitment and objectives to renewals. Mikel did a great job and achieved his goals”

I don’t know about you, but I call bullshit on what appears to be an attempt by Edu to oversell their efforts in both the transfer market and from a asset management perspective…firstly, if he wants me to believe that they had a 180 page dossier on the likes of Vieira, Jesus, Zinchenko, Jorginho, Trossard, Havertz and Lokonga, he had better send me some of that kind bud he’s been puffing so that I might be in a better frame of mind to accept this utter nonsense…now if there’s any truth to these claims, everyone involved in these forest killing misadventures should be fired immediately

secondly, his “great job with renewals” claim is incredibly baffling…in the last 12 months alone he’s re-upped and/or gave handsome raises to Elneny, Eddie, Nelson, Jorginho and Ramsdale, none of whom really matter in the grand scheme, except for maybe Jorginho, but that’s really only because Partey is so injury-prone…4 of those 5 barely saw the pitch, which wouldn’t be so tragic if this was all part of a long-term developmental plan, but we’re now looking to sell 3 of the 4, which will be exponentially more difficult due to their unjustifiable wages

finally, after making claims regarding the “whole group” making decisions, he later on states that Mikel alone did a “great job” with recruitment and renewals…so what is it Edu, a group decision or a monopolistic one? after all, if we had slipped down the standings and Edu had said the exact same words, it would appear as if he was laying blame at the feet of the manager…regardless, one has to only look at the rumours ciruclating around MA’s own re-up to see who’s clearly running this show…as of right now MA makes approximately 9M/yr, whereas Pep makes about 20M, but it the rumours are to be believed his new salary with look far more like Pep’s than his current one…maybe we should be vastly more concerned with getting this window right, from a recruitment standpoint, than stuffing more millions into the pocket of our resident consolation prize expert…just saying

oh dear god. A pay rise for coming 2nd.

https://www.dailymail.co.uk/sport/football/article-13472615/Mikel-Arteta-arsenal-contract-pay-rise.html

Tony
They will probably double his salary as they love paying over the odds for second best.

Ramsdale given a decent increase only to be removed from the number 1 goalie spot almost immediately. Newcastle want him as their number two – because of his wage they are prepared to offer £15M.

There’s apt to be plenty of chatter, especially by the most ardent Kool-Aiders amongst us, if and when Havertz gets the nod up top for Germany this summer…before you get too chesty about it though please keep in mind his present competition, Maximilian Beier, Niclas Fullkrug.,Thomas Muller and Deniz Undav…hardly a whos who of the best forwards in Europe…keeping in mind that Muller will be celebrating his 107th birthday in the fall…context matters

who’s who

There on my desk, I have reports with more than 180 pages on a player…

Vieira
Well, he should learn to fucking speed read then shouldn’t he? With all that money I’m sure he could get a pretty good coach. What a massive, incontinent whining Brazilian baby!

I can’t remember which Woody Allen film it was, but there’s a scene where he tells a woman that he has speed read ‘War and Peace’. The woman is impressed and says, ‘So what’s it about?’ So WA replies. ‘it’s all about these people who fall out and make up at the end.’

Imagine Edu or Tets finding that little story funny? No, me neither. Not a shred of self-awareness in either of them.

Boo hoo. I’ve got to read a long report for work – woe is me!

How do you read Tolstoy at scan speed – I have the Russian film version – 9 hours of bumbling Pierre Besuhov (incorrect spelling) and a bloody great big bit of war with a short Frenchie.

I have read it three times.

Gasper likes his role – he can mix with the slimy super agents that screw the players and the teams. Why does the PL league not take action against agents (or any other league for that matter)

KP-if one were to believe that these “reports” actually exist, your point is well-taken…I would suggest it’s more of an attempt to cover-up MA’s wild and sporadic lusting over a whole host of players, many of whom weren’t even discussed at length, let alone the subject of some sort of meticulous review process

Norg-the acceptance of the whole agent nonsense can be traced back to those times when owners badly mistreated their respective players…it’s like a reparations campaign being perpetrated by a class of individuals who might be even more weaselly than those aforementioned owners…as is often the case, a well-intentioned act becomes a monetized nightmare over time

Hi NORG
I’ve discovered another thing I admire about you! War and Peace is scary just to look at. When placed flat on a table, most versions must be at least 4 inches high! Tolstoy isn’t my thing. Far too wordy for me and for Woody.

I started with Dostoevski and drew a line after reading Crime and Punishment and the Brothers Karamatzov. All that snow, violence, poverty and human cruelty! No wonder Russia is so fucked if their literary canon seems so miserable. If it’s 19th century weighty literature, then it has to be France and Zola in my opinion.

Moscow and Tblisi were my final overseas work trips. Not exactly a glamorous swansong. Middle of winter, getting followed everywhere, and eating nasty things that looked and tasted like medium rare equine testicles. Not for me. I was glad to get home although I felt a bit like a minor character in a Le Carre novel.

At least the UK has produced some of the greatest spy-related literature. I worship JLC and was affected by his death a few years ago.

KP – Book 1 of W&P is a good read book 2 is war and a bit more war. I haven’t read a book in years – perhaps I will when I eventually retire.
Apparently Tblisi has become a hot venue for city breaks – Ryanair must be serving the place with flights at £10 a go.
Le Carre is a good read – trouble is you cant put the book down once you start.

KP
Any chance to put a story to the background on how you derived to the El B moniker?